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Category Archives: Sillyness

What a joker

What a joker

Who tells me I ought to smile more

Who tells me I ought to smile more

It was the day after ‘Batman: The Dark Knight’ was released in the cinemas. Some of my friends are BIG BIG Batman fans. They were off to see the film that evening. In the afternoon they were that excited they decided to dress up as the Joker for when they watched the film.

Now sitting in a beer garden with 2 people looking like the joker made a slightly unusual afternoon, but not enough for a post on this blog. What was really unusual was how we killed some time in the afternoon before the film.

It's a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?

It's a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?

Yes, you didn’t guess it, we went and played golf. Yes myself and the 2 jokers, impersonations included. The faces on the other golfers on the course was a picture! Below is even the standard Joker playing a bunker shot photo…

You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push!

You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push!

Stubbed out

Stubbed out

I was sat in a bar in Old Street when I glanced out the window. I had to make another glance to make sure I had seen what I thought I had. As you can see from this photo all I could see was a life size cigarette moving around.

A walking talking cigarette

A walking talking cigarette

It wasn’t for another 10 minutes until it moved did I see some human legs, I have no idea why it was hanging out on a derelict street by a waste bin.

Now at least the horse had some kind of logical reason for being in Spitalfields in the previous post.

These donkeys however have no reason to be outside Greenwich park on a rainy day. This was a very obscure area of Greenwich park too where no-one was really around. Donkey rides should be on a sunny beach only.

Just what I was after, a donkey ride

Just what I was after, a donkey ride

Why is there 1 horse on it's own in the market?

Why is there 1 horse on it's own in the market?

I was on my lunch break recently and went to get some food from Spitalfields market. As I made my way I suddenly noticed a horse on it’s own in the market. This may seem normal in some markets but not here. You rarely see animals in central London, apart from the Zoo and especially here! So I took a photo of the horse not really knowing what it was doing here because no-one nearby seemed to be connected to the horse.

Oh it's clear now, the horse was waiting for a knight in shining armour

Oh it's clear now, the horse was waiting for a knight in shining armour

I got my lunch and walked back past the horse and soon discovered a knight on top of the horse! Actually this did make sense, because I soon remembered it was St George’s Day and this must have been a publicity stunt. Still though, it’s not everyday you see a knight on a horse in the financial hotspot of Spitalfields!!

This happened a few years ago, but I recently found these photos and had to post it. A few mates and myself were at the Camden Crawl walking towards Koko. It’s a little tricky to work out what happened here from the photos but I shall try my best to describe.

Hanging out in a big wheel

Hanging out in a big wheel

One angry man with a passion for sandwiches

One angry man with a passion for sandwiches

We noticed a big wheel – with it being a music festival thought it was a piece of artwork/monument type thing – and decided to stand in it. We then decided to get some silly photos taken with us sat in the wheel.

Suddenly this bloke comes running over really angrily from nowhere (he’s the guy pictured in the grey shirt in the photo directly above) shouting ‘GET OFF MY SANDWICHES!!! THEY’RE MINE!!!’ We weren’t exactly sure if he was talking to us but we were then suddenly ushered out of the wheel so he could get his sandwiches – he did not find it funny.

This is someone who passionately likes a sandwich, but someone who leaves them in the most bizarre place – a giant wheel in Camden.

The pie in American pie seems pointless now

The pie in American pie seems pointless now

I recently went to Amsterdam on a typically long holiday for me – 1 day – with work to celebrate our company birthday. This is your typical cake you would find in an Amsterdam bakery.

I swear I can’t go more than 2 night bus journeys in a row without something wierd going on. I thought this journey was rather normal and was getting worried by this. I could feel something odd was just a stop or 2 away.

Low and behold a couple of stops later this bloke proved those suspicions right. On he came with a cabinet and some high heels. He couldn’t follow his friends upstairs with the cabinet so where does he have to sit? Right next to me.

A cabinet and some expensive shoes

A cabinet and some expensive shoes

He explained this was the 6th and final night bus he had been on that night because he couldn’t find his way home. So while he was getting lost he saw the cabinet and high heels somewhere and decided to take them on his journey. He was explaining he knew these shoes were expensive and in good condition.

At this point another bloke comes over and asks how much this guy wants for the high heels. I said let’s do an auction on the bus. As this went on and the supposed buyer couldn’t buy the high heels he became frustrated and promised to kick the cabinet stealer’s face in. I quote from this guy “who does he think he is coming on here with a cabinet?” It was then my stop and unfortunately had to leave the drama.

The Jesus army badge

The modern Jesus army badge

Sticking on the Christmas theme (this is stretching the post similarities I know) is this beauty. Me and my mate Tom were walking through the backstreets north of Oxford Street when we came across the modern Jesus army van. It was all on it’s own. It was Sunday that day too, surely it should be in use on this religious day. What was it doing there? What is this all about? If it belonged to someone in the building it was parked outside then to afford a place there, the church must be paying well these days.

The modern Jesus army van

The modern Jesus army van

Unbelievable

Unbelievable

It was rubbish collection day and so I put the bin bags out the night before like usual. I came back after lectures that day to find that for some reason, and the first and only time ever the bin bags were still outside my house. In fact they were the only bin bags left outside anyones house.

I inspected the rubbish to find this note left by the bin bags. They were not collected because I had tied my bin bags?? Hang on, doesn’t every person in the country tie their bin bags, isn’t that the idea? I then phoned the council on the number on the note and they had never heard of this before and thought I was winding them up! The woman from the council couldn’t stop laughing and thought it was ridiculous.

In the end we got our landlord to take the rubbish to the skip. The following weeks after we tied the bin bags just like before but they were rightly taken away from the bin men.

My friend Michelle is known by her entire family and friends back where she lives as ‘Spud.’ But how did she get this nickname attributed to her?

You didn’t guess it. Her mum used to clean muddy potatoes by licking them clean while she was pregnant with Michelle.